Wednesday July 23rd 2013: something happened yesterday, I'm sure...

Holy crap! If there was ever a time to have a baby it's now. The likes of Tesco, Asda, Wilkinson's etc are all having royal baby events which basically involve union jack bunting and lots of baby stuff slashed to half price. 

Poor Kate. Not only does she have to contend with supermarkets slashing the prices of their sudocrem, supposedly in honour of the new baby and not in honour of their cash registers, she also had the world's press waiting outside her door. The future Queen might as well have given a Twitter update every half hour on how far she had dilated because she was under that much scrutiny. The amount of photographers waiting for the new family outside the hospital probably meant that she turned down the customary Bounty picture and pack whilst inside. (A small victory for Netmums who are campaigning against pushy Bounty women; however, that does not mean they have won the war. No: even as I write,  new mothers up and down the country are having a Bounty pack forced upon them).

Thinking about this most recent Royal Birth has made me reflect on my earlier blogging, in January, about Queen Victoria's parenting skills. I have a feeling that our future Queen won't be a candidate for The Jeremy Kyle show like Queen Vicky would have been.

My top 5 companies cashing in on the birth of the new Prince are:

5. Clarks baby shoes (ahem) "Shoes fit for a prince!"

4. Mumsnet swears 'By Royal Decree'...A big vote for a Bundler at nighttime. When babies are tiny, they poo in their sleep and a bundler is easier to change than a babygro, so you don't wake them'. Somehow,  I can't imagine this 'decree' ending up on some board outside Buckingham Palace.

3. 'The Baby Show' fancy a 'Royal Trip'  (geddit) to Olympia in Kensington in October - I mean, October is nowhere near bloody July!

2.  BRITAX: A Prince is born..."The beaming couple were seen leaving hospital last night carrying the new prince in a BRITAX Babysafe SHR and Isofix base car" aarrgghh!!!!!

1. Thank the Lord for my beloved Cath Kidson who along with children's charity 'Banardo's' wanted to celebrate the Royal Birth by getting us thinking and digging deep in our pockets to help those children whose need for Clarks shoes, a trip to The Baby Show and a Britax car seat is low on their list of priorities.